Friendships are a such an important part of our life but sometimes changes in our friendships happen as we grow up and that is normal. Things can change in friendships because of the activities we are involved. Our interests change which can have an effect on this and sometimes you just grow apart. This can be hard for tweens and teens.
When this happens though sometimes, they can feel sad or lonely and that’s totally normal and natural to feel that way. Sometimes it happens abruptly or fast and sometimes it happens over time.
If your child wants to learn more about friendships, I have 2 blog posts you can check out, having good communication with friends and what makes a good friend. Both important topics!
Today I wanted to share with you some ideas to help your tween or teen when their friendships start to change because it can be a challenge, and I want to make sure they have some tools in their back pocket to help navigate this.
Tips to navigate changes in friendships
Sometimes friendships change because we change.
When we start getting older, we start to discover things that light us up or things we like to do. It could be playing a sport to art to baking. Whatever it is for you think about what you love to do now. Did you love doing that thing when you were in preschool? Maybe you did but most likely you grew into what you are liking now. It’s the same with friendships. Sometimes we bond with someone because of the activity we are doing at the time. When that activity isn’t who we are anymore sometimes it changes our friendships change because we want to do something else. All of this is ok, and you your friend may still love that ballet class, but you want to try new things. This doesn’t mean you can’t still be friends but know that the relationship may change a little bit because we changed, and our interests have changed too.
Talk to your friend.
Communication is Queen. If a friendship means so much to you and you want it to last, then you must speak up. I know it may seem scary to bring up something like this and talk to your friend about the changes you are feeling inside but that conversation is important. It’s also important to do it face to face. Not on text. Being able to see your friend in person and having these conversations in person is so important. It may seem easier on text but sometimes we need to step outside our comfort zone and do those hard things. We will grow because of it. Tell him or her how you feel from that moment forward.
Sometimes friends are only there for a chapter and that’s okay.
As you get older you someday may be transitioning into middle school or high school. The friends that we grew up with may be taking a different path than us. Its all ok and totally normal. We have friends that we loved and laughed with. That friendship served us so much and filled us up, but as we grow and move onto different stages in our life sometimes friendships can end. Maybe not end forever like you never talk to that person again but that friendship is not like it use to be. You may not hang out as much or talk as much. Friendships happen to us for a reason and those friends that we had in a small chapter of our life will forever be in our memories and something that we cherish forever. Don’t be so hard on yourself if a friendship you once had has changed because you are now in a new chapter of your life.
Friendships are special and wonderful part of life but I want you to understand that they change and grow all the time. It takes effort and communication to keep that friendship alive and thriving. It takes work and if it means a lo to you then you are willing to put in that work.
Also, know that if you drifted apart from someone just remember that you can reach out and make it happen. There is no reason that friendships can’t get back to the way they were. All it takes is one person being brave to reach out and make it happen. Sometimes 30 seconds of fear can change your life or your friendships forever.
I hope you learned something new about changes in friendships and that it’s all ok!
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