Negative self-talk is something we all have that its that soundtrack that we play over and over in our heads! that inner mean girl that we all have needs to go and I have a few tips to help!
I recently read a book called “Soundtracks” by Jon Acuff and it has helped me so much with tools for getting those negative thoughts out of my head.
As a teacher, I see it and hear it every single day.
As a mom I hear my kids.
Let’s be honest….I have negative self talk too!
How does it start so young? Why does it continue to get louder and louder as we get older?
I want to teach my kids tools that they can use to help combat that negative self-talk and the recurring “soundtracks” they play over and over in their heads.
Let’s help kick her inner mean girl to the curb or tools to help silence her!
Here are a few tips that you can do to help her TODAY!
- Use Affirmations
Affirmations are a great way to help her reprogram that negative self-talk. I know you may be rolling your eyes with this one but I am telling you they work! Its a simple thing that when used over and over again can have dramatic changes in your life. Here’s how it works. Have her pick a mantra or affirmation, for example I can do hard things. When things get tough with homework and she feels like giving up or even if she’s overwhelmed with cleaning her room. Tell her to say the affirmation to herself during those times and she will see how this changes her outlook. It changes that negative thought that is in her brain.
It definitely doesn’t happen overnight but it will make an impact when used every single day. Have her make an affirmation list. She can use this list when a negative thought starts popping up in her mind over and over again.
2. Praise her Effort
Try to praise her for trying, being consistent, showing up and working hard. It doesn’t always have to be the A on the paper. How about how hard she studied to get that B on her really hard test. Making sure to praise her effort and not always the end result will help her not revert to the negative thinking about herself and how she’s not good enough because she didn’t get the A or win the trophy. This is also teaching her about a growth mindset and how if she can always keep putting effort in she will grow.
3.Be There No Matter What!
I think this is a no brainer for moms but make sure that you are there for them for the good, bad and the ugly! Which I assume you are. Make sure to let her know that you are there for her to talk about anything no matter what it is. She needs to have a place of comfort and safety and that should be her home and with you.
4. Praise Her Character
Praising her character and who she is on the inside will help her to see more than her outside appearance. Compliment her wit, humor, generosity, and loving nature. She will grow up hearing that she is more than her appearance.
I hope these ideas will help her and you get rid of that negative self talk and that inner mean girl will be silenced! Let’s not say she won’t ever come back but having some tools to help silence her will come in handy for the rest of her life!
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